Rev. Randle J. Schmaltznegger, the ebullient American spiritual dynamo, counselor extraordinaire, evangelist supreme, recently ran a retreat for Christian leaders under the rubric: “Loosing your Heart and Soul to God: the Passion and the Intimacy”. But in a debacle that has been described by one rival American evangelist as the valley of the dry bones in reverse, Schmaltznegger's retreat leaders, having been relieved of their hearts and souls stormed out of their secluded Mid-West venue as the retreat turned into an attack, creating havoc in the surrounding area. As ever, an undaunted Schmaltznegger sussed the spiritual problem immediately and in a riposte stated firmly that “One of the leaders failed to claim the victory in his home life and allowed Satan to find a way into our retreat - this leader admitted to me that his son has a friend who once played with Pokemon cards”. Police using Abrams tanks, B52’s and tactical nuclear weapons, eventually brought the situation under control.
Danger, Evangelists at work: “Anyone seen our Lost Souls?”
(The above article was first published in the February 2004 edition of VNP)
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